All the Sexy Single Ladies…Don’t Date These Fools

Fashion time again…this one pertains to pants. Boys, I call you boys even if you are technically men because you cannot be considered men if you engage in this fashion trend, what is up with the pants sagging below the ass? Now I know I am just a white 30-year-old female, so what the hell do I know about this trend found primarily in African-American boys under the age of 25? I’ll tell you, absolutely nothing. I would like a thorough explanation though. I should probably title this post something sexual so that those of you who can answer my questions will happen upon this blog when you Google “big boobs” or “sexy ladies.”

Here is what I do know about this trend…it is STUPID! First, I do not want to see your underwear, I don’t care how nice it is or what designer brand it is, public displays of underwear are not acceptable. And most importantly, if there were an emergency you would die. I don’t care how cool you think you look I have seen you try to climb stairs at anything faster than a snail’s pace to no avail. I have seen you try, and fail, to walk more than a few steps without tuggin’ at your pants all gangsta like. Belts were meant to go around your waist, not your thighs, hence the fact that your pants don’t stay up pathetically tied around your thighs. Let’s just say, god forbid, there were a fire and you had to run for your life down a hallway and up a flight of stairs…you would go up in flames, all in the name of looking cool. Whatever great intelligence or talent you may have (I’m trying to give you the benefit of the doubt here) would be gone…forever. And, you would die looking stupid. How cool is that?

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About djunapassman

I teach yoga, write, and edit. I live in a Brooklyn neighborhood that is changing faster than I can, or care to, keep up with. Manhattan still beckons me to her island a few subways stops away, reminding me of when I lived amongst her daily hustle and bustle.
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